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JHYM Retreats provide a safe and trusting community in which we seek to find that of God in ourselves and in each other. There are so many developmental, social, and spiritual aspects of life changing between 6^th and 9^th grade. Giving young people a place to be able to be present to those lightening speed changes within themselves, and one to another -- while still having fun – and learning that they can build their own beautiful, loving community of peers is incredibly rare and powerful. Our charge, as ministers of the Spirit, is to help our young people create a sanctuary in grace and joy.

WE ARE: Anne Anderson, Jason Bachand, Carol Baker (as our Exalted Food Wizard!), Buddy Baker-Smith, Gretchen Baker-Smith, Dave Baxter, Jim Campbell, and Felice Lopez…. A small but mighty crew!

WE ARE DEEPLY BLESSED to have both Jason and Felice joining us for their first JHYM Retreat staffing experience. Both are tried and true veteran staffers in other programs and times (JYM and Sessions). I am so grateful!

JOINING US, as of now, are 30-ish JH’ers, 13-ish of whom are first timers – though few are brand new to NEYM Youth Retreats. Due to our staff: child ratio, I have stopped taking registrations for this retreat.

Timelines

PLEASE NOTE THE SIGNIFICANT PROGRAM CHANGE THIS YEAR. WE WILL NOT BE SHARING SUPPER TOGETHER ON FRIDAY NIGHT. I AM AWARE THAT THIS COULD BE A BURDEN TO MY STAFFERS, AND I APOLOGIZE.

Arrival: I will be arriving with Buddy around 4:30pm. Registration is at 7pm. Please let me know your e.t.a. – anytime between 5:30 and 7 will be fine and much appreciated!

Wrap-up: Sunday Morning Worship is at 10:00, followed by announcements and lunch. I anticipate we’ll be out by 1 or 1:30pm. Given our small numbers, I need to ask that everyone be prepared to stay through clean up. I will put the word out to parents – and hopefully we will get some help from them as well. Thank you!

DIRECTIONS TO PROVIDENCE ARE ON OUR WEBSITE. Note that we cannot park on the street over night! When you arrive, I’ll show you the area behind the Meeting House that we’ll use.

A Note on the Theme: To Whom Do You Belong?

In our culture, we are defined by what we do. ‘I’m a soccer player, a musician, a Magic fanatic.’ In many other cultures, the important question is not what we do but “To whom do you belong? Who is your community? Who is your family?”

This theme was given, almost word for word, as vocal testimony in Worship this past spring by a woman who grew up in our Meeting but who now lives on the other side of the country. She was home for a week visiting her parents, and she spoke quite movingly in the Silence about the strength that still carries her, all these years later, in being from Westport Meeting. I went up to her at the rise of Worship and asked her for permission to use her message for one of our retreat themes. She just laughed and said, “Oh, Gretchen, I don’t own this – it was given by the Spirit!” So true, wise Friend, so true.

This seemed like a particularly good theme for the first retreat of this program year. We will be feeling the loss of last year’s large and rock solid 8^th grade, as we, once again, begin to build a new community in JHYM. It always happens. I am hoping that the spirit of inclusiveness that so dominated our group last year will carry on into this one. Nurturing this along may take gentle involvement and encouragement from staff – and a fairly intentional schedule of programming.

The small group notes that follow will give you a glimpse into the many layers that I am hoping we can explore and celebrate this weekend around belonging. Please hear my invitation to bring music, stories (we are hoping Anne will be led to share a Bible Story for our Saturday Evening bedtime circle), games, prayers, etc. as well. Ideally, it’d be great to hear about any major leadings you may have before the retreat -- but God doesn’t always work on those timelines, I know!

Small Groups

Small Groups will meet three times over the course of the weekend: Friday evening, Saturday morning, and Saturday evening. We will be divided into 3 small groups – with 10 JH’ers and 2-3 staffers for each group. You’ll be in the same small group for the weekend. Details follow. Additional resources will be in your staff notebooks!

1. As always, start with a little Silence and a round of check ins. Take as long as you need to, and be sure to stress the goals and expectations of small groups, respect, confidentiality, etc. Please see First Timer Staffing Notes and/or the Suggestions for Leading a Small Group sheet in your staff notebook for additional guidance.

2. Each group will have 2 beach balls with many questions written around them. (See the theme title for this small group for clues! J) The idea is to toss the ball to someone, who then gets to answer the question that either thumb is touching -- or is closest to -- when they catch it. After they answer it, they get to throw it to someone else, being mindful that everyone gets a turn. Start with ball #1, which has “easier” questions. When everyone has had an opportunity to answer one of those, move on to ball #2. The goal of this evening’s small group time is simply to get to know each other and feel comfortable together. Nothing too stressful or challenging! (So, if someone doesn’t want to answer a particular question, use your finesse and infinite hospitality to help them answer another!)

3. DO take 5-10 minutes before you wrap up this small group to talk about “what it means to belong” and try to tease out an understanding that works for your group. Use the large paper to write words, phrases or drawings to help. You can bring this to the large group to share if your group wants to, but this is entirely optional!

1. As always, start with some Silence and a round of check ins. Take as long as you need to, giving space and time for any reflections on what was shared in our morning worship, especially if one of the speakers is in your small group.

When things are hard, who “is there” for you? Who helps to “pull you through?”

Does centering or turning to the Light Within take you to a place where you belong?

The questions are numbered in your box. I would suggest having one JH’er (perhaps the oldest or youngest in the group or the one who has been in JHYM the longest?) pick a question to answer and then pass it on to the person of their choosing to answer as well, who then passes it on to the person of their choosing….. When everyone has answered that one (of course they can always choose to “pass”), move on to the next. Go deeply whenever the group heads that way – and veer into totally new territory as the Spririt leads.

2. Lay out the different art and writing materials and encourage everyone to simply work with whatever they feel drawn to, considering everything that we have shared this weekend and everything that has been stirring around within them about “Belonging.” I’ve made CDs for you to play in the background.

3. Save a few minutes at the end of your small group time to share what was created and what experienced. Stress that it’s never about the end result – but rather, about where it takes us and what opens for us when we are in a reflective, creative, centered place within us.

4. Close with a circle of hands, silence, song, or moment of thanks. And know my deep gratitude to each of you, dear Friends, for all you are and do for our community!

Depending on the weather and our final count of staffers and attenders, we may go to Roger Williams Park, a short drive down Rt. 95, on Saturday afternoon. If not, we will come up with workshop options for everyone to choose to do at the Meeting House.

Providence Meeting is next door to Moses Brown School – which just so happens to be hosting its annual alumni homecoming weekend this weekend, too. I am sorry that I didn’t know this when I scheduled this retreat. There will be a lot of people and cars in the neighborhood. I’ve been assured that no one else is scheduled to use the building, but we will have to be flexible and possibly improvise how we use the outside space.

In case you were wondering, the Small Group activity that I had originally planned for Saturday Evening has been morphed into a large group activity for Saturday Night, modeled after Point-Counterpoint.

Carol Baker, wonder woman Quaker, will be joining us on Saturday morning as our retreat cook. She just cooked for JYM at Woolman Hill last weekend – and giving her Friday night “off” helped ease the way for her to cook for us as well. This means that we will have to take care of major snacks and dessert ourselves on Friday evening. So those of you who can arrive early may be put to work in the kitchen!

“FREE TIME”

Junior Highers want free time, but most of them want it with structure so that they can be in community. This is my mantra: “free time” is not staff free time. All of us on staff need to initiate group games (Apples to Apples, Egyptian War, JYM Ball, Graveyard Tag), inspire craft projects, encourage the creation of new Who’s Who Book pages, and engage stragglers into the mix in any ways we feel led – or the young people themselves lead. With JH’ers, it can be especially important to gently, continually nurture inclusivity. Please consider your gifts and leadings – and go for it!

To Whom Do You Belong?

Timelines

A Note on the Theme: To Whom Do You Belong?

Small Groups

Staff Assignments