Stay Beautiful for God
JHYM Retreats * Feb. 26 – 28, 2010 * Framingham Meeting
Attributed to Mother Teresa and adopted by Kevin Lee, this quote is a powerful and loving reminder that our bodies and lives are unique and sacred gifts. What is real beauty? How do we deal with our culture’s images of beauty, feminism and masculinity? And, what does it mean to treat ourselves as holy temples having that of God within? Join us as we retreat from the buzz and frenzy of the world to enjoy and take care.
AND AS OF TODAY, WE HAVE
34 JH’ers (4 brand new
to retreats and 1 more first timers in JHYM) registered to join us.
Such blessings!
The JHYM Retreat program’s goal is to provide a safe and trusting community in which we seek to find that of God in ourselves and in each other. Our charge, as ministers of the Spirit, is to help our young people create a sanctuary. What I appreciate more as the years go on, is just how rare and astounding a “safe and trusting spiritual community” truly is for young teens. What we “do”, with the Grace of God, is provide them with an experience in building a spiritually grounded community that they then take with them, and hopefully build on, for years and decades and a lifetime to come.
Arrival: Kevin and I will be arriving around 4:30pm. Could one or two of you (no more than that needed, thanks!) come around then to help unload and set up? If the rest of you then aim to arrive around 6:30, we will be absolutely fine. Registration is at 7pm, and the JH’ers arrive en masse then. We share a light supper and aim to start program at 8:30.
Please let me know your E.T.A. Thanks!
Wrap-up: Sunday Morning Worship is at 10:00, followed by lunch, cleanup and goodbyes. If everyone on staff can stay until 1:00, we will all be able to get on the road before 1:30. If you need to leave earlier than this for any reason, please let me know.
DIRECTIONS TO Framingham Meeting ARE ON OUR WEBSITE.
It would be helpful to have 2 more CD Players for small groups – if you have one you can bring let me know, please?
Thoughts on the Theme: Stay Beautiful for God
Last year, one of our current 8th graders wrote me a note on the back of her evaluation suggesting that we do a retreat called “Reality Check” and talk about how advertising and the fashion industry portray unrealistic bodies. Good stuff. It caused me to remember, again, the phrase “Stay beautiful for God,” which Kevin Lee has used for years in his work with young people. And voila, a retreat theme was born.
One of the greatest gifts we can help children and teens develop is a core belief in their own beauty and worth as human beings, that they are children of the Light. There is that of God within. It is my experience that as their awareness of the Light within grows, so too can their understandings and compassion for that of God -- within, around, and in all beings – grow as well.
Unexpectedly, as I began to research and prep for this, I discovered that the “Beautiful for God” is widely known to come from Mother Theresa, but the “stay” seems to be a Kevin-ism. I’ve always loved the “stay” part, because it reminds young people, especially teens, of the essential role they need to play in the care of their own hearts and souls – and not just for themselves, but also, for God. So, thank you, Kevin.
Striving to keep ourselves in a place of peace and grace helps us be open to the Presence of God, nurturing us, sustaining us. It also allows us to be available for the movements of the Spirit as they waft on by. “Have thy tools ready. God will find thee work” (a favorite quote of mine by Charles Kingsley) includes having the toolbox in working order – hinges oiled, stuff put away from the last job. A seasoned Friend walking faithfully and gracefully with the Spirit, in peaceful balance, is, indeed, a most beautiful sight.
Tending that flame is a lifelong job. It’s one our children growing towards adulthood need encouragement and guidance in learning how to do for themselves, just as importantly as learning to drive, run the washing machine, take public transportation, and fill out job applications. We give them a gift when we help them find what works best (even if just for right now), and stay clear of the aspects of our culture that don’t.
Middle schoolers are particularly in need of affirmation and safe, loving communities to balance out all of the negative messages coming at them. The media and culture overwhelmingly portray unreal body images, lives, and relationships. These are the years their self-confidence and sense of self can often plummet. It is so rough out there. They thrive when we can honestly, in community, joyfully affirm how beautiful they are – in all of their silly, awkward, stressed, beautiful, and sometimes grungy, changing bodies and selves. Our JHYM Retreat community provides them with a haven and a place to reconnect with their inner light, God within – and the ground-spring of love and grace that is accessible to us always, but sometimes most easily when we are in community with the Spirit.
So, thank you, dear Friends, for being part of this circle. You are beautiful, too!
Small Groups will meet 3 times over the course of the weekend: Friday evening, Saturday morning, and Saturday evening. We will be divided into 4 small groups – with 8-9 JH’ers and 2-3 staffers for each group. Detailed information and activities for each of the small groups will be in your staff notebooks.
Friday Evening’s small group will, hopefully, build trust and community and then get everyone thinking (and talking) about what “real beauty” is, and how we define and experience it.
Saturday Morning’s small group will focus on the similarities and differences in our own definitions, understandings, and experiences of beauty as Quakers and in our culture’s.
Saturday Evening’s small group will encourage us to consider ourselves as vessels of Light, of God within, and have some fun trying to create images with various art materials.
More and more of our JH’ers are on Facebook, other social networks, and online game sites of all kinds. Safety on line is a topic Kevin teaches on a regular basis in his “day job” as the town youth advocate. He has agreed to lead a timely discussion with our community before lunch on Saturday. I am so grateful.
Saturday Afternoon Workshops
This is a time for us to all really relax and/or play. Workshops will run an hour and a half or so. JH’ers will make first and second choices, and we’ll do our best to fulfill requests. By this time in the school year, the JH’ers are pretty weary (even with the school vacation week just prior to it), and they thrive on this afternoon in community.
At this point, here is my thinking. (Let me know if your “assignment” won’t work for you! I am flexible!)
Wellesley College Greenhouse Tour Emily and Kevin
Foot and Energy work Shannon and GretchenStorytelling Theater Project Anne
** If Anne gets a lot of signups for this one, we’ll pull a second staffer from the group games group.
I think we will use the little room off of the Meeting Room on the 2nd floor for this retreat.
In order to keep these staff notes shorter and more accessible for my well-seasoned staffers, I’ve created a new resource called “Detailed Information for Staffers” that includes information on how small groups work, quiet hour, free time, staffing expectations, etc. If I haven’t emailed it to you, you can find it on our website and/or in your staff notebook. Thanks!
“FREE TIME”Junior Highers want free time, but most of them want it with structure so that they can be in community. This is my mantra: “free time” is not staff free time. All of us on staff need to initiate group games (Apples to Apples, Egyptian War, JYM Ball, Graveyard Tag), inspire craft projects, encourage the creation of new Who’s Who Book pages, and engage stragglers into the mix in any ways we feel led – or the young people themselves lead. With JH’ers, it can be especially important to gently, continually nurture inclusivity. Please consider your gifts and leadings – and go for it!
Retreat Nurse: Carolyn, please – thank you!
Craft Table Elder: Shannon
Name Tag Czar: Adam
Photographer: Kevin
Free Time Staff Elder: Anne
Mural Elder: Emily
Registrar: Dave
Supreme Kitchen Goddess: Wendyl Ross
Esteemed Visitor: Stephen
Gretchen Baker-Smith, JHYM Retreat leader
508-997-0940 (h) * hellogretchen@gmail.com * 508-287-6441 (cell)